It came from you

Her perfectly formed lips, beautiful almond shaped eyes, heart-melting smile, sweet button nose, infectious laugh, and her incredible charisma, it all came from you. But what you heard on that day when they called our house was that her genetic mutation came (was inherited) from you. 

What we learned with that one phone call is that Pepper’s genetic mutation was inherited from daddy. What it means for her epilepsy, is that this genetic mutation is not likely causative of her seizures. Why? Because daddy has never had seizures, and does not have any family history of seizures. The other genetic tests have also all come back negative, but the crestfallen look on your face when they told you she inherited this unique mutation made me die inside. My rock, my hero, my best friend and partner in crime. To see you reduced to this sad pensive shell as you thought deeply about what it meant to pass on to her this genetic mutation. Overall it likely means nothing in the scheme of her health, but the idea that it could possibly be the reason for her seizures seemed to take you down.  I cannot say whether or not I would have felt the same way had they told me she had inherited it from me, but one thing to note is by way of inheriting it from us, this genetic mutation is ruled out as a possible reason for her seizures. Back to the drawing board it seems.  More tests appear to be in our future as the elusive cause of our daughter’s seizures continues to be a mystery to us.

As Father’s Day approaches, I am tasked with the adventure of finding the most fitting way to celebrate the man who gave me the two most perfect children I have ever met (bias much? Nooooooo…) They say the fastest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, and I believe that to be true, because if we ate all of daddy’s favourites on Father’s Day, cardiac arrest might be the surprise guest at the dinner table. No….  My sweet, even tempered, hard working, patient, empathetic, caring, polite, strong, articulate, handsome, athletic, intelligent, loving husband deserves much more than that. Any ideas? What to give the man who gave me everything? I wish I could give him some time with the other man who gave me everything (my father) but with my father gone and having never had the chance to meet the man who lights up my every day… Alas, that’s a dream that will never be. 

Father’s Day is always a bittersweet celebration for me. On the one hand, I mourn another year without the man who called me his treasure and loved me with his whole heart. He wiped my tears, kissed my boo-boos, picked me up every time I asked to be held, slept beside me when I thought Freddy Krueger would get me, and never once complained about it. On the other hand, I live in the present, with a man every bit as strong and loving as my father was. He wipes our tears, sleeps with our restless children, kisses boo-boos, makes us incredible meals, sings to us, holds our hands, holds our hearts and lights up our lives with his very presence. Somehow, I don’t think another tie or a tool belt would express our gratitude. 

One thing we will do, as is tradition in our house, is we will go to visit my father at the cemetery. We do this every year. There is a McDonalds across the street, so we allow ourselves some of the cursed golden arch goodness on that day. (Daddy gets his Big Mac) The kids don’t understand what it means to us yet, but hopefully, it will be a very very long time before they do. After we have paid our respects and sent a little prayer up for my father, we continue on with celebrating daddy. This celebration would not be complete without a visit to the man who moulded and shaped him. 

To my dear father-in-law and Ong Noi to our children, thank you for everything you sacrificed for your family. Without your hard work, love and sacrifices, we would never know this happiness. 

Sweetheart, there are no gifts or words that can express our gratitude for having you in our lives. Just know that the light you see in our eyes, the smiles on our faces, the generous spirit we impart to others.. It all came from you. 

Wishing all the Fathers, Grandfathers and father figures out there. Whether they be here or guardians above, a very happy Father’s Day next Sunday.